18 Comments

good to see the greatest line* ever in a movie review/synopsis made a return appearance here from the book version

*"Sting, where is thy Death?"

Expand full comment

You'd think a movie that starts off with women in glass tubes would have been better, but that dream was shattered, much like the tubes

Expand full comment

You know, pulp magazines gave me a WILDLY inaccurate picture of how often one could expect to encounter girl-sized glass tubes in the wild.

Expand full comment

You need to hang around quicksand bogs more often.

Expand full comment

Well I *would*, but turns out they're not *quite* as plentiful as DANGER ISLAND on old THE BANANA SPLITS SHOW strongly implied they'd be.

Expand full comment

Likewise girls in glass tubes. Except in some hydroponic gardens.

She's a beauty....

Expand full comment

By the way, they should have named the Beals' character "Abby Normal".

Expand full comment

<<Frankensting gives Jennifer the Eliza Doolittle treatment>>

The brains in Spain fall mainly on the plains...

Expand full comment

"the curried wurst he had at Oktoberfest isn’t agreeing with him"

It was the worst wurst, after all

Expand full comment

It’s the Robert Durst of wursts.

Expand full comment

Did you really want to have a burst of wursts, given that I went furst?

Expand full comment

I'm cursed.

Expand full comment

Could be wursed. You could need a nurse and not get reimburse-d.

Expand full comment

I thought I could traverse the wurst, but your outburst is well-versed and relentlessly disbursed, so you know what? Just call me a hearse.

Expand full comment

You're a hearse.

Now throw me your purse.

This reply was truly terse.

Expand full comment

After Quadrophenia and Brimstone and Treacle, I was willing to overlook Sting in Dune...well, minus one scene, of course..but this movie put me off his acting for good.

Expand full comment

Absolutely the same.

Expand full comment

Awesome review. I never saw this movie, but always thought about it.

It probably would've worked much better shortened and made into one of the chapters in "Four Rooms".

I can see undead Jennifer Beals telling Tim Roth to "Take the Money" and Roth trying to explain the whole thing to Marisa Tomeii later.

Have to admit though, you tying it in with Death in Venice is way better!

Expand full comment